No matter what age you are when your relationship breaks up or why it broke up, a breakup or divorce can feel very devastating. If jealousy was one of the main causes of the breakup, chances are you will simply repeat this pattern until you begin to tackle the issues that create your jealousy and heal them. What you may not realize is that you future success in relationships is directly related to how much you learn from those
breakups, how much you heal your jealousy and how you move forward in your life.

As Relationship Coaches, we've identified several keys to understanding your breakup and your broken heart after a relationship breakup or divorce. These keys are areas that you must deal with in order to heal, let go and move on to creating more love in your life.

With that being said—here are the four of those keys to healing after a breakup, especially if jealousy has been involved...

Key #1: Begin actively doing things to heal your broken heart. 

When there has been a relationship breakup that may have been precipitated by your jealousy, it’s often tempting to wallow in your pain—to play music that reminds you of your old partner, to visit places where you went together as a couple, to relive whatever fears you felt in the relationship, to constantly think about that other person and to fear that you will always fail at relationships.  While it’s important to give yourself some time and space to grieve, it’s also important to start doing things that
will be loving to yourself and that will help you to heal.

What have you not done for yourself that you used to love to do? Are there any friends who you haven't seen that you want to connect with again? Make sure that when you get together with other people that you not spend your time talking about your ex or wanting sympathy from your friends. Take the opportunity to explore new adventures and do new things.

Key #2:  Take steps to heal your wounds from your past relationships.

If you had jealousy issues in the relationship that broke up, you need to overcome jealousy before you get in a new relationship. You may have been in a series of past relationships where your partner cheated on you.  You may have low self-esteem issues.  You may have had a habit of flirting with people other than your partner to get your partner’s attention.  Whatever patterns you had that helped destroy your relationships, the time to heal it is now.

If there has been infidelity and your partner was the one who was unfaithful, make sure that you take the time to figure out what you might have done differently.  In many cases, infidelity and affairs would never happen if people understood how each person sabotages the relationship. Because people don’t take the time to figure out what their part in the relationship breakup was, when they get into new relationships, those unhealthy patterns tend to show up again and those relationships often end in break ups and divorce.

You might choose to read some books that will help you to understand where your jealousy is coming from and how you can heal it.  You may want to work with a therapist to help you on your path to healing. Sign up for our free jealousy course at the bottom of this page to start. You have nothing to lose!

Key #3: One way to begin healing from a breakup is learn how to build
trust in yourself, in your current relationships and ultimately in a new
relationship. 

When there has been a breakup, it’s often difficult to open your heart one more time. Take the time to begin learning to trust again and that begins with learning to trust that you will speak your truth and then practice doing it. When you know that you will say what you need to say and listen with an open heart to other people when they speak, you will begin to trust.

Key #4: In order to heal and move on from a relationship breakup,
you have to begin envisioning what you want for a new relationship.

We’ve found that when you have a clear idea about exactly what you want in a new relationship and take steps to grow as a person, that type of relationship comes to
you and your perfect partner will show up.  Many people feel that it isn’t possible to attract a soul mate to you but we know that soul mates exist. You just have to be clear in what you want and heal your jealous patterns that have made life difficult for you up until now.